some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
Randomize
