Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
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