FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
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