Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
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