im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
