and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Randomize
