He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Randomize
