You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
Randomize
