She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
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