There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Randomize
