Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
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