remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
then he tried to convert me to islam
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize
