the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Randomize
