You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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