"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Randomize