I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
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