the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
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I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
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She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
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