Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Randomize
