at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
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