I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
