Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
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