he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
I checked into jail on foursquare
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
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