My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
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