Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize
