...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize
