it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
I met the friendliest cop last night
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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