ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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