Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
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