two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize