You're so nebulous sometimes
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
Randomize
