My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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