Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
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