This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
