I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
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