Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize
