Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize