if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
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Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
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Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
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