Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
North Korea, Best Korea!
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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