I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Randomize
