"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
We got so high we made milksteak
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
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