Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
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