I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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