True but thats because hes a fetus.
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
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