at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
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