The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
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