You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
