yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
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