i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize
