You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Randomize
