ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
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