is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize